My soul waits for the Lord
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning. (Ps 130:6)
How do I proceed from here? Do I give up all hope? I can’t remember how long I’ve been waiting any more, but it’s becoming a frightening experience. I’m beginning to feel like an abandoned child that the mother never came back to pick up. Talk to me Lord, if you can hear me up there. Give me a sign that you know that I’m still here. I don’t want to wait in fear any longer, I want to wait in hope that you are coming.
I hear everything around me even the birds asking: “where is her God?” I want to tell them that my God has asked me to wait until I’m humbled enough to do what he has called me to do; that you are pruning me and keeping me on my knees everyday until I become that woman that you want. But Lord, I don’t know if they would understand, because sometimes I don’t understand myself when I look at everything around me moving but me.
I will wait for the LORD,
who is hiding his face from my house .
I will put my trust in him.” (Isaiah 8:17)
You used to answer when I called on You. Now all I here is wait. My spirit keep asking; “how much longer Lord?” I was waiting patiently until you spoke to me two years ago; since then days and months have passed and nothing has happened. I keep wondering how long do I have to drown in my sorrow; wondering if today is the day that you show up? It is truly hard.
Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you;
he rises to show you compassion.
For the LORD is a God of justice.
Blessed are all who wait for him! (Isaiah 30:18)
“LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary?
Who may live on your holy hill? He whose walk is blameless
and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart
and has no slander on his tongue, who does his neighbor no wrong
and casts no slur on his fellowman.”
( Ps. 15:1-3
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